Depression Causes Dealing With Depression After a Breakup By Kendra Cherry Kendra Cherry Facebook Twitter Kendra Cherry, MS, is an author and educational consultant focused on helping students learn about psychology. Learn about our editorial process Updated on September 06, 2022 Medically reviewed Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. Medical Reviewers confirm the content is thorough and accurate, reflecting the latest evidence-based research. Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. Learn more. by Steven Gans, MD Medically reviewed by Steven Gans, MD Steven Gans, MD is board-certified in psychiatry and is an active supervisor, teacher, and mentor at Massachusetts General Hospital. Learn about our Medical Review Board Print Verywell / Maritsa Patrinos Table of Contents View All Table of Contents Symptoms Causes Diagnosis Treatment Coping Breakups can take a serious toll on your well-being. Not only can the end of a relationship lead to major life changes in finances and living situations, but breakups also create a great deal of emotional turmoil. Some splits are easier than others. You might be able to let go and move on fairly quickly. In other cases, you might feel angry, sad, bitter, anxious, and heartbroken. All of these emotions can be perfectly normal after a romantic breakup—but if they lead to prolonged feelings of sadness or apathy and significant impairment in areas of life functioning, this might be a sign that something more serious is going on. Stressful life events such as a breakup or divorce can sometimes trigger prolonged and severe emotional distress. One study found that even normal post-breakup emotional states closely resemble clinical depression. Experiencing depressive and other symptoms following the end of a relationship is sometimes diagnosed as an adjustment disorder with depressed mood, also sometimes referred to as situational depression. Because these feelings with adjustment disorders can last six months to two years, it is important to understand the signs and symptoms so that you can find help and support if you need it. Symptoms of Breakup Depression Feelings of sadness can vary from mild to severe after a breakup. Sometimes these feelings can be strong for a relatively brief period of time. In other cases, people might feel a range of mild to strong feelings of sadness that fluctuate and linger for a longer period of time. Because emotional responses to a breakup can vary so greatly, it can be difficult to discern when to reach out for additional support. More serious symptoms that may indicate depression include: Feelings of hopelessness or helplessnessLosing or gaining weight; appetite changesSleeping too much or too littleLoss of pleasure and interestFeelings of worthlessnessFeeling sad, empty, or worthlessnessFatigue and lack of energyListlessnessThoughts of death or suicide Grief and sadness are human responses to stressful and painful life events. Research has found that breakups can influence people in a number of profound ways.Following the end of a relationship, people report experiences such as distress, loneliness, and a loss of self-esteem. Allow yourself time to grieve the loss of the relationship. Responses may include a period of mourning, sadness, frustration, bargaining, anger, denial, and regret. It is a period of adjustment, so you grant yourself as much time as needed to feel what you feel, process, and heal. While upsetting, these feelings usually start to shift with time as you heal and recover mentally, emotionally, and relationally from the breakup. If your symptoms seem more serious than normal sadness after a breakup or if your symptoms seem to be getting worse, talk to your doctor about what you are feeling. How to Recognize Symptoms of Depression Causes of Depression After Breakup As a form of situational depression, the end of a relationship is what triggers these feelings. A breakup can be a point of major change in a person’s life. Not only does it mean no longer being involved with someone you once loved, but it can also lead to an entire cascade of life changes. Shared friends may choose sides, which can lead to the end of other relationships. You might have to adjust your finances, your living situation, or even cope with the challenges of co-parenting children with your ex. Breakups can also influence how you view yourself. One study found that the end of romantic relationships influenced how university students felt about their own academic performance, including their ability to concentrate, their homework, and test scores. Another study found that breakups not only altered self-concept but that people who have a greater disruption in their self-image are also more likely to experience more post-breakup emotional distress. All of these adjustments can be challenging. They can make you feel confused, insecure, anxious, and sad. And in some cases, it may trigger more severe and longer-lasting symptoms of depression. Diagnosis of Depression After Breakup Breakup depression is not an actual medical term or diagnosis, but this does not mean that what you are feeling after a breakup does not represent a real condition. If you decide to talk to your doctor or mental health professional about it, they may ask you a number of questions about your symptoms including their duration, frequency, and intensity. Depending on your symptoms, your doctor might diagnose you with adjustment disorder with depressed mood (sometimes referred to as situational depression). Adjustment disorders are conditions that can occur when you have marked distress or difficulty functioning following a stressful life event. To be diagnosed with this condition according to DSM-5, you must: Begin experiencing symptoms within three months of the identifiable stress (in this case, a breakup)Have symptoms that are out of proportion to the severity of the trauma that also take into account other things in your life that might influence your symptomsHave symptoms that are not the result of another mental disorder Different Types of Depression Treatment The good news is that even if you do experience depressive symptoms triggered by a breakup, they usually begin to get better on their own by six months after the event. As time passes, your situation improves, and you begin to recover from the breakup, in most cases, you will find yourself gradually feeling much better. If your symptoms are mild to moderate, you may be able to handle them on your own by practicing good self-care and surrounding yourself with a strong support system. If your symptoms are more severe or if you just feel that you need a little extra help coping, talk to your doctor or therapist. Counseling can be helpful to help you gain perspective, address negative thought patterns, and establish coping skills that may help you both now and in the future. If your symptoms are severe or do not seem to be improving, your doctor may also prescribe medications such as antidepressants that can help. If you or a loved one are struggling with depression, contact the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357 for information on support and treatment facilities in your area. For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database. The Best Online Help Resources for Depression Coping With Depression After Breakup Whether you’re are having normal post-breakup sadness or something more serious, there are things that you can do to make it easier to cope once a relationship ends. While there is no way to predict who will experience breakup depression, there are things that you can do to help make yourself more resilient to stressful events. Some things you can do include: Forming a strong social support network, including online networksCaring for yourself and your healthLearn problem-solving skillsWork on improving your self-esteemCreate goals to work towardTake steps toward solving your problemsFind a sense of purpose in your lifeAllow yourself time and space to process feelings in ways that feel true, honoring, and supportive for you (i.e. through art, music, movement, journaling, etc.) Research has also shown that writing about what you are feeling or positive experiences can improve coping after a traumatic event. Finding ways to stay occupied can also be helpful. While you might be tempted to brood, doing things that keep your mind and body busy keep you from ruminating over negative thoughts. Try digging into a new project around the house or start up a new hobby that you’ve been wondering about. Exercising and spending time with friends can also be a great way to elevate your mood and cope with post-breakup stress. Research has also shown that writing about what you are feeling or positive experiences can improve coping after a traumatic event. Breakups can interrupt your sense of personal agency and even challenge your self-concept. Focusing your attention on the aspects of your life where you do have more control, such as your work or your hobbies, can help you restore your sense of mastery and help you feel more empowered. Press Play for Advice On Dealing With Sadness Hosted by Editor-in-Chief and therapist Amy Morin, LCSW, this episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast, featuring best-selling author Helen Russell, shares how to accept and embrace your sadness. Click below to listen now. Follow Now: Apple Podcasts / Spotify / Google Podcasts A Word From Verywell The end of an intimate bond can signal a whole host of life changes. Sometimes these changes can be a good thing—it can lead to personal growth or moving on to a relationship that is more supportive and loving. In some cases, they can result in lingering feelings of depression. While it is normal to be sad or even heartbroken for a while after a breakup, you should talk to a professional if your symptoms seem to be stronger or lasting longer than you would normally expect. Focus on taking care of yourself, reach out to friends and family for support, and don't hesitate to talk to your doctor if your symptoms seem to be worsening. Why Some People Are Prone to Depression 10 Sources Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy. Verhallen AM, Renken RJ, Marsman JC, Ter Horst GJ. 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Symb Interact. 2010;33(1):71-95. doi:10.1525/si.2010.33.1.71 By Kendra Cherry Kendra Cherry, MS, is an author and educational consultant focused on helping students learn about psychology. See Our Editorial Process Meet Our Review Board Share Feedback Was this page helpful? Thanks for your feedback! What is your feedback? Other Helpful Report an Error Submit Speak to a Therapist for Depression Advertiser Disclosure × The offers that appear in this table are from partnerships from which Verywell Mind receives compensation.