Self-Improvement What to Say to Someone Who Is Going Through a Hard Time With Dr. Kelsey Crowe Tips from an empathy expert By Amy Morin, LCSW Amy Morin, LCSW Facebook LinkedIn Twitter Amy Morin, LCSW, is the Editor-in-Chief of Verywell Mind. She's also a psychotherapist, the author of the bestselling book "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do," and the host of The Verywell Mind Podcast. Learn about our editorial process Published on October 10, 2022 Print Verywell / Julie Bang Table of Contents View All Table of Contents Meet Dr. Kelsey Crowe Why Dr. Kelsey Crowe Is Mentally Strong What You’ll Hear on the Show What You’ll Learn About Mental Health and Mental Strength Quotes From Dr. Kelsey More About the Podcast Every Monday on The Verywell Mind Podcast, Editor-in-Chief Amy Morin, LCSW, interviews authors, experts, entrepreneurs, athletes, musicians, and other inspirational people about the strategies that help them think, feel, and do their best in life. Follow Now: Apple Podcasts / Spotify / Google Podcasts Meet Dr. Kelsey Crowe Kelsey Crowe, PhD, heads Empathy Bootcamp, a company that trains people to be more empathetic. She earned her doctorate in social welfare from the University of California, Berkeley and she has taught social work classes at California State University. She is also the author of "There Is No Good Card for This." In it, she describes what to say to someone who is going through a difficult situation, like the loss of a loved one or a divorce. Why Dr. Kelsey Crowe Is Mentally Strong Kelsey is a breast cancer survivor. Her experience showed her how difficult it can be for other people to know what to say or what to do when someone is going through a hardship. She took what she learned from that experience, as well as her knowledge of empathy, and created a roadmap for other people with her book. She gives actionable ideas that can help anyone feel more confident when they respond to someone else’s pain. The Mental Health Impact of Receiving a Breast Cancer Diagnosis What You’ll Hear on the Show What cancer taught Kelsey about empathy The things other people did or said that made a difference in her life Why it’s so difficult to know what to say to someone who is going through a hard time How to get over the fear of saying the wrong thing The one question you can ask in almost any situation How to know when you should say nothing at all The kind gestures you can do for someone who is struggling How to know when it’s OK to share your own experience How to avoid toxic positivity The difference between curiosity and concern What to do if you have avoided saying something to someone you know is struggling Why Vulnerability in Relationships Is So Important What You’ll Learn About Mental Health and Mental Strength Although many people have grown more comfortable talking about their own mental health, talking to someone else about their emotional pain can still feel quite awkward. But a few kind words and a willingness to listen to someone can go a long way toward helping them when they’re struggling. Fortunately, we can all learn empathy skills and build confidence in our ability to respond to someone’s emotional pain. Quotes From Dr. Kelsey Dr. Kelsey Crowe There are so many people in our lives that we come across that have problems. So, just be there for them. But if you don't care, leave it alone because then it just seems like curiosity and not [out of] concern. — Dr. Kelsey Crowe "What do people wanna hear? They do want to hear [about] hope, but it has to be founded in something real, not a TV show." 9 Things to Do If You Feel Hopeless More About the Podcast The Verywell Mind Podcast is available across all streaming platforms. If you like the show, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. Reviews and ratings are a great way to encourage other people to listen and help them prioritize their mental health too. Editor’s Note: Please be mindful that this transcript does not go through our standard editorial process and may contain inaccuracies and grammatical errors. Thank you. For media or public speaking inquiries, contact Amy here. Download the Transcript Links and Resources Buy Kelsey’s Book, "There Is No Good Card for This" Check out Empathy Bootcamp If You Liked This Episode, You Might Also Like These Episodes Friday Fix: What to Do When You’re Emotionally Exhausted How to Have Better Conversations With Bestselling Author Celeste Headlee Friday Fix: 5 Boundary Mistakes to Avoid What to Say to Someone Who Is Depressed By Amy Morin, LCSW Amy Morin, LCSW, is the Editor-in-Chief of Verywell Mind. She's also a licensed clinical social worker, psychotherapist, and international bestselling author. Her books, including "13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do," have been translated into more than 40 languages. Her TEDx talk, "The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong," is one of the most viewed talks of all time. See Our Editorial Process Meet Our Review Board Share Feedback Was this page helpful? Thanks for your feedback! What is your feedback? Other Helpful Report an Error Submit Speak to a Therapist Online Advertiser Disclosure × The offers that appear in this table are from partnerships from which Verywell Mind receives compensation.