I Feel Lovesick: What to Do and How to Cope

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The term “lovesick” might sound like an imaginary or exaggerated state of mind. While lovesickness is not a clinically recognized mental health condition, it’s a very real feeling that can have a notable impact on your emotional well-being. In some cases it can impact your ability to go about your day normally, and some people even experience physical effects. 

“Feeling lovesick means you miss or long for a loved one to the point of feeling emotionally or physically ill,” notes Amber Trueblood, LMFT. “Lovesick individuals are often so focused on the intensity of their connection to their partner, other areas of their life begin to suffer.”

Closely tied with deep feelings of grief, you can experience lovesickness for many different reasons. That includes painful breakups or divorce, feeling disconnected from your current partner, being ghosted by someone you were excited about, having a loved one pass away, or going through a case of unrequited love.

Signs You're Feeling Lovesick 

Before working through the complex emotions tied to lovesickness, it’s important to first identify the issue. Like symptoms of depression, Trueblood says that people who are feeling lovesick may feel like they have less energy than usual, have a reduced or increased appetite, and that they may struggle with their sleep. 

Further, the phrase "broken heart" is often synonymous with lovesickness, and it's named after the physical feelings of losing someone you love. Technically referred to as stress-induced cardiomyopathy, broken heart syndrome can cause chest pain due to a surge of stress hormones.

People who are experiencing lovesickness might also find themselves hyper-fixated on the person they’re missing, which can affect their ability to focus or accomplish routine daily tasks. Trueblood says, “Lovesick ‘victims’ may find themselves compulsively checking for messages, emails or texts from their partner.”

Regarding emotions, you might also experience a painful array of emotions depending on who you’re feeling lovesick about. For instance, if you were ghosted or broken up with then you might struggle with feelings of worthlessness or low self-confidence. 

If you’ve lost that connected feeling with your current partner, you may feel fear, betrayal, or confusion. Or if a loved one passed away, you might feel a sense of grief or despondency. In cases of unrequited love, you might feel unlovable, invisible, or ashamed. 

How to Overcome Feeling Lovesick 

The best thing to do when you feel lovesick is to practice self-awareness and healthy emotional self-care. 

“Notice if you’re avoiding friends or family, not eating or sleeping in a way that’s healthy for your body,” Trueblood advises. “Also take note of whether you’re obsessively thinking about [the other person].”

When feeling like you’re missing or longing for someone so deeply, it’s important to ground yourself and find balance. Give yourself space to feel your emotions wholeheartedly, but do create boundaries around how long you allow yourself to fixate. Maybe it’s 30 minutes of time spent journaling about your thoughts, and then softly redirecting your attention back to something else when your mind wanders back.

Amber Trueblood, LMFT

If intense feelings of love and longing are impacting your physical health, work, or other relationships, getting additional support and help is recommended.

— Amber Trueblood, LMFT

Keeping yourself thoughtfully busy can also help. That doesn’t mean filling up your calendar so you don’t have a chance to “feel,” but rather finding opportunities to connect with others in meaningful ways, investing your time in new hobbies that bring you joy, and taking time for self-care activities such as reading, writing, gardening, singing, or even a bubble bath. 

Daily meditation, a healthy diet, and regular exercise can also help you overcome feeling lovesick. Research shows that moderate running can boost your mood.

If you need additional support to help you sort out these feelings, that might mean reaching out to a trusted friend to share your grief, gain a new perspective, or gather helpful advice.

It could also mean finding a therapist who can help you walk through your array of complex emotions so you can reclaim joy, improve your self-confidence, or better understand why you’re experiencing lovesickness to begin with.

A Word From Verywell 

If you’ve ever felt lovesick, know that you’re not alone. It’s a very human feeling cataloged in classic literature, movies, and memoirs. Be kind with yourself, but do take steps forward that can help you overcome the type of lovesickness that impacts your day-to-day functions and emotional well-being. Invest in yourself, confide in trusted friends, and consult with a therapist if you’re feeling stuck.

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3 Sources
Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
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  2. American Heart Association. Is Broken Heart Syndrome Real?.

  3. Damrongthai C, Kuwamizu R, Suwabe K, et al. Benefit of human moderate running boosting mood and executive function coinciding with bilateral prefrontal activationSci Rep. 2021;11(1):22657. Published 2021 Nov 22. doi:10.1038/s41598-021-01654-z