Stress Management Coronavirus (COVID-19) The Benefits of Writing Letters Sending Snail Mail Provides a Meaningful Way to Connect By Barbara Field Barbara Field Barbara is writer and speak who is passionate about mental health, overall wellness, and women's issues. Learn about our editorial process Updated on November 29, 2022 Medically reviewed Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. Medical Reviewers confirm the content is thorough and accurate, reflecting the latest evidence-based research. Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. Learn more. by Rachel Goldman, PhD, FTOS Medically reviewed by Rachel Goldman, PhD, FTOS Facebook LinkedIn Twitter Rachel Goldman, PhD FTOS, is a licensed psychologist, clinical assistant professor, speaker, wellness expert specializing in eating behaviors, stress management, and health behavior change. Learn about our Medical Review Board Print Verywell / Jiaqi Zhou Table of Contents View All Table of Contents Friends and Relatives Feel Valued Writing Is Healing It Slows Down Our Communication It Lessens Screen Time Letters Are Tangible Letter Writing Connects Strangers Letter Writing Connects Loved Ones Writing letters might seem like an out-of-date way to communicate when we have easy access to relatives and friends through text, email, FaceTime, and Zoom. Yet, snail mail is a powerful way to connect with others, which came to the forefront during the COVID-19 pandemic. In research published in May 2020 by the United States Postal Service (USPS), 65% of people agreed that receiving mail lifted their spirits. About 67% said they have sent or would send mail to family and friends. Letter writing may have gained more interest because it’s a reflective, slowed-down activity, rather than another quick chore. You can dash off a text in seconds, without paying much attention. But it takes time and purposefulness to send letters. While letter writing may be an old-fashioned way to keep in touch with people, this form of correspondence shows intention. You have to compose the letter, get an envelope, find a stamp, and send it from your mailbox. Friends and Relatives Feel Valued Recipients recognize that it’s harder to communicate through this method and appreciate the time invested. In the USPS study, 61% of respondents found that “mail is extra special during this time of social distancing” and 54% of respondents found that communication via snail mail fostered a “more meaningful connection to those they sent mail to.” People feel special and valued when they receive personal letters. This is especially true during times when we are physically distanced from loved ones who live across the country or on the other side of the world. Writing Is Healing James W. Pennebaker, the Regents Centennial Chair of Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin, is a pioneer in the field of expressive writing. He has written extensively about the positive benefits of writing in both articles and books including Opening Up: The Healing Power of Expressing Emotion and Writing to Heal: A Guided Journal for Recovering from Trauma and Emotional Upheaval. Journaling With proven positive benefits, there are various ways to use writing as a constructive tool during the pandemic. For example, you could write in a journal, a popular way to express feelings and thoughts. Journaling helps you process the upsetting news you hear, make sense of it, and ultimately cope with it. Journaling is also beneficial in managing stress. Letter Writing Letter writing is another form of writing that’s especially helpful in processing difficult things. “I’m a psychotherapist and writer,” says Sherry Amatenstein, LCSW, author of four books. “I often recommend that my patients write letters to themselves and others. Whether they send the letters or not isn’t necessarily the point.” She continued, “For example, let’s say I have a patient we’ll call Diane who has childhood wounds that keep getting triggered. Meaning when someone makes a comment that is upsetting, the pain she feels goes deeper than the thoughtless remark, opening wounds that still fester. I will suggest that Diane write a letter to her younger self, who suffered these grievous wounds. Many studies show that writing is a healing act.” It's therefore very beneficial to use letter writing to share with, to confide in, and vent to your friends or relatives. Frustrations or sadness—or any emotion—can then be expressed as you write to caring people in your life. Receiving letters of reassurance in return from your grandparents, for example, who may have lived through difficult periods in history, may help you feel reassured. Recipients of reassuring letters feel more optimistic about getting through challenging times. It Slows Down Our Communication Letter writing, compared to digital exchanges, slows down our communication. Our society has become bombarded with rapid news and an expectation of rapid responses. During the pandemic, our understanding of COVID-19 as well as the knowledge gained by scientists changed by the minute. We became attuned to quickly changing situations regarding childcare and schooling, racial protests and reckonings, earthquakes and storms, as well as political tumult. This barrage of stressors was, understandably, taxing. Slowing down our communication is a big plus. With overflowing inboxes, we race to respond and move on to the next email. When we open our home mailbox, it’s unusual to find something that’s not a bill—a positive surprise. In the past, people anticipated, looked forward to, and got excited about receiving letters. To find a letter in the mail, sit on the couch, and read something handwritten by a loved one is rewarding. We can take our time. We don’t need to multi-task with various items open on our laptop; rather, we focus on this one personal thing, this letter in our hands. We get the refreshing benefit of slowing our mind and body down. It Lessens Screen Time These days, many of us have relied almost exclusively on electronic conversations even before the pandemic. It’s therefore understandable that we are exhausted by Zoom meetings and FaceTime happy hours. Thus, letter writing has become an old-but-new-again alternative. Young People Are Interested in Letter Writing, USPS Report Finds It’s not just older people who are interested in communicating by snail mail either. The Postal Service research points out that younger people in particular were more likely to want to send cards and letters during the pandemic. Maybe all of us are saturated with screen use, even native users, and welcome an alternative. Letters Are Tangible It’s no surprise why people were baking bread, working on puzzles, and showing more interest in crafts when the virus limited our ability to get out. When we can’t hug our family members or hold an older friend’s hand, we reach for tangible ways to enjoy life. Writing a letter is creating something tangible and enjoyable, too. You write letters with a pen and paper and the recipient can physically open and hold onto a letter. Older people, especially those in nursing homes and those living far away from family, felt isolated and depressed due to coronavirus lockdowns and restrictions. Letters, even those merely about daily activities, are comforting and are opened with enthusiasm. Letter Writing Connects Strangers Letter writing can also connect strangers in beneficial ways. A New York Times article revealed the burgeoning growth of pen pal programs during COVID-19. Especially popular are intergenerational programs matching children and older people. Limited interactions during the pandemic created a slew of negatives for older people. Dawn Carr, PhD, a sociology professor at Florida State University and faculty associate at the Pepper Institute for Aging and Public Policy, underscores that many older adults felt isolated and lonely during lockdowns and restrictions. Feelings of isolation contribute to poor mental health outcomes including higher rates of clinical depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation, and development of dementia. Pen pal programs serve as a way to increase interactions in a safe and beneficial manner. Meanwhile, the pandemic adversely affected the mental health of children and teenagers, too. From not seeing friends at school to being disappointed by sports and other extracurricular activities being curtailed, kids too became anxious and depressed. Pen pal programs, especially intergenerational ones, forge connections and benefit children and older adults alike. The lost art of letter writing unites people and is a boon to those of all ages. Letter Writing Connects Loved Ones While all kinds of letters can connect people, one of the best kind of letters you can send someone dear to you is a letter of gratitude. Expressing gratitude through a card or letter especially lightens the hearts of your recipients. Sherry Amatenstein, LCSW I often tell patients to express gratitude for what you have versus dwelling on what you don’t have. It helps people focus on gratitude. — Sherry Amatenstein, LCSW It takes extra effort to write and send a letter, but Amatenstein says “It’s a lovely gesture. You have to think ‘What do I want to say to express appreciation?’ I suggest you’re specific and heartfelt. For example, you can write, ‘I really appreciate that you came once a week during the pandemic. You shopped and delivered groceries to me, risking your own health. Your generosity means a lot to me.” Amatenstein adds, “So many studies show the psychological well-being benefit of actually expressing gratitude. Especially when we are in this sad and lonely place, focus on someone else’s kindness and thank them for it.” A Word From Verywell Letter writing offers many benefits and is a rewarding practice that’s back in style. In its most basic form, it can help us maintain family ties and friendships, and share news. But it can also help us express our feelings of anxiety, gratitude and hope. Letter writing also helps us connect with strangers and deepen our connections with loved ones. Unlike daily and disposable digital communications, these letters provide a history of our relationships that we can go back to and treasure. Letters take on more significance in an age of electronic communications. Letter writing creates a more lasting form of communication, too. 2 Sources Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy. United States Postal Service. USPS Market Research and Insights: COVID Mail Attitudes – Understanding & Impact (April 2020). Zaveri M. To battle isolation, elders and children connect as pen pals. The New York Times. By Barbara Field Barbara is writer and speak who is passionate about mental health, overall wellness, and women's issues. See Our Editorial Process Meet Our Review Board Share Feedback Was this page helpful? Thanks for your feedback! What is your feedback? Other Helpful Report an Error Submit Speak to a Therapist for Stress Management Advertiser Disclosure × The offers that appear in this table are from partnerships from which Verywell Mind receives compensation.