What Exactly Is Self-Esteem?

We all know that self-esteem sometimes referred to as self-worth or self-respect, can be an important part of success. Too little self-esteem can leave people feeling defeated or depressed. It can also lead people to make bad choices, fall into destructive relationships, or fail to live up to their full potential. A grandiose sense of self-esteem, as exhibited in narcissistic personality disorder, can certainly be off-putting to others and can even damage personal relationships.

Self-esteem levels at the extreme high and low ends of the spectrum can be harmful, so ideally, it's best to strike a balance somewhere in the middle. A realistic yet positive view of yourself is generally considered the ideal. But what exactly is self-esteem? Where does it come from and what influence does it really have on our lives?

In psychology, the term self-esteem is used to describe a person's overall sense of self-worth or personal value. In other words, how much you appreciate and like yourself.

• Self-esteem is often seen as a personality trait, which means that it tends to be stable and enduring.
• Self-esteem can involve a variety of beliefs about yourself, such as the appraisal of your own appearance, beliefs, emotions, and behaviors.

Why Self-Esteem Is Important

Self-esteem can play a significant role in your motivation and success throughout your life. Low self-esteem may hold you back from succeeding at school or work because you don't believe yourself to be capable of success. By contrast, having a healthy self-esteem can help you achieve because you navigate life with a positive, assertive attitude and believe you can accomplish your goals.

Many theorists have written on the dynamics involved in self-esteem. The need for self-esteem plays an important role in psychologist Abraham Maslow's hierarchy of needs, which depicts self-esteem as one of the basic human motivations. Maslow suggested that people need both esteem from other people as well as inner self-respect. Both of these needs must be fulfilled in order for an individual to grow as a person and achieve self-actualization.

It is important to note that self-esteem is a concept distinct from self-efficacy, which involves how well you believe you'll handle future actions, performance, or abilities.

As you might imagine, there are different factors that can influence self-esteem. Genetic factors that help shape overall personality can play a role, but it is often our experiences that form the basis for overall self-esteem. Those who consistently receive overly critical or negative assessments from caregivers, family members, and friends, for example, will likely experience problems with low self-esteem.

Additionally, your inner thinking, age, any potential illnesses, disabilities, or physical limitations, and your job can affect your self-esteem. 

You probably have a good sense of who you are if you exhibit the following signs: 

• Confidence
• Ability to say no
• Positive outlook
• Ability to see overall strengths and weaknesses and accept them
• Negative experiences don't impact overall perspective
• Ability to express your needs

You may need to work on how you perceive yourself if you exhibit any of these signs of poor self-esteem: 

• Negative outlook
• Lack of confidence
• Inability to express your needs
• Focus on your weaknesses
• Excessive feelings of shame, depression, or anxiety
• Belief that others are better than you
• Trouble accepting positive feedback
• Intense fear of failure