Relationships Understanding Rape and Sexual Assault By Sarah Sheppard Sarah Sheppard Sarah Sheppard is a writer, editor, ghostwriter, writing instructor, and advocate for mental health, women's issues, and more. Learn about our editorial process Updated on June 23, 2020 Medically reviewed Verywell Mind articles are reviewed by board-certified physicians and mental healthcare professionals. Medical Reviewers confirm the content is thorough and accurate, reflecting the latest evidence-based research. Content is reviewed before publication and upon substantial updates. Learn more. by Steven Gans, MD Medically reviewed by Steven Gans, MD Steven Gans, MD is board-certified in psychiatry and is an active supervisor, teacher, and mentor at Massachusetts General Hospital. Learn about our Medical Review Board Print Verywell / Nez Riaz Table of Contents View All Table of Contents What the Law Says Understanding Consent Alcohol and Drugs What to Do Sexual assault is a severe, punishable act that should not be taken lightly. Maybe you hooked up with someone while you were drunk. Maybe a stranger touched you inappropriately in passing. Maybe you were pressured into having sex with your partner. What is and isn’t considered sexual assault? In short, if you’ve experienced unwanted sexual touching, of any kind, then you’ve likely experienced sexual assault. However, there are many situations that need to be taken into account when talking about rape and sexual assault. What the Law Says About Sexual Assault Unwanted touching, of any kind, is unacceptable social behavior, but unwanted sexual touching is criminal. Federal law defines many different sexual crimes, from “forcible touching” and “sexual misconduct” to “aggravated sexual abuse” and “predatory sexual assault against a child,” but it’s important to know that state jurisdiction can vary. Many sexual assault crimes are considered felonies and depending on the state, sexual assault may be called “sexual battery,” “criminal sexual penetration,” or “rape.” Rape is considered a type of sexual assault. Categories of sexual assault include rape, as well as the following: Attempted rape (in which rape was the motive)Fondling or unwanted sexual touching (which includes groping, kissing, etc.)Forcing a victim to perform sexual acts Unwanted sexual penetration (which could involve non-body parts or objects)Sodomy (anal or oral sex) without consentSexual contact with minors, consensual or not If force, coercion, or incapacitation exists in a sexual act between two adults, it is considered sexual assault. Rape, in particular, is defined by federal law as: “Penetration, no matter how slight, of the vagina or anus with any body part or object, or oral penetration by a sex organ of another person, without the consent of the victim.” Other types of sexual assault that aren’t often talked about include female genital mutilation (removal of part or all of the female genitalia) and sexual assault between intimate partners or martial couples. Despite misconceptions, intimate partner rape (also called marital rape or spousal rape) does occur and it can be extremely detrimental to an individual’s mental health. Understanding Consent Because sexual assault is a non-consensual sexual act, it’s important to define “consent.” When engaging in sexual relations of any kind, consent deals with more than just “yes” or “no,” which is why sexual assault (including rape) can be so controversial. “Mutual consent is key, yet the type of consent is critical,” explains clinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly, PhD. Any child under the age of thirteen cannot legally consent to having sex, even if they say “yes,” to a consenting adult. This is automatically considered “statutory rape” or “unlawful sexual intercourse.” When it comes to teen sexual assault, however, there are some unique factors to consider. You are not obligated, under any situation, to have sexual relations with another person, even if that person is considered a sexual partner or spouse. However, sometimes individuals feel obligated, and this is one reason why the issues around sexual assault can be so complicated. Consider the following hypothetical situations: A stranger touches an individual’s private area in public, but they have pants on.An individual is pressured by a manager to engage in sexual acts to maintain their position at the company.A 14 year old and a 12 year old both consent to having sex. Though this seems innocent, the two consenting individuals are “minors” and cannot legally consent.An intimate partner insists that you have sex or they won't let you leave the house, so you unwillingly agree. Threats in intimate partner relationships are extremely unhealthy and dangerous.You agree to have sex with a partner as long as they use a condom, but they either remove it or damage it on purpose. This is called stealthing and it is unacceptable.You consent to having sex with a partner one day but do not consent to having sex with that same partner the next day and they force you to anyway. All of the above scenarios are examples of sexual assault. If you feel pressured, or feel you have no other choice but to consent, then your decision is likely being “forced," and saying "yes" becomes irrelevant. Because many sexual acts occur in private between just two people, there aren’t usually witnesses who can attest to the consent or the situation in which consent was unable to be freely given, and that’s why sexual assault cases can sometimes be so challenging. Here’s what all of us should keep in mind: if the situation feels uncomfortable, if an individual is not fully capable of consenting or is not consenting in a clear way, you should not continue with that sexual act regardless of hearing the word “yes” and if you’ve started to engage in a sexual act, but the individual changes their mind, then stop the act immediately. The Bottom Line If the situation feels uncomfortable, if an individual is not fully capable of consenting or is not consenting in a clear way, you should not continue with that sexual act regardless of hearing the word “yes” and if you’ve started to engage in a sexual act, but the individual changes their mind, then stop the act immediately. What Is Rape Trauma Syndrome? How Alcohol and Drugs Play a Role Casual sex is a large part of dating culture, as well as college culture, and the lines of consent can become blurry. When young adults experiment with drugs and alcohol, they often engage in risky behaviors which can quickly lead to sexual assault. Elizabeth L. Jeglic PhD, Professor of Psychology at John Jay College of Criminal Justice, recommends “[not] engaging in [any] sexual activity when one or both parties are drinking or under the influence of substances. An individual cannot consent when they are drunk or high.” How do you know if someone is under the influence and unable to consent? Signs of drunkenness or intoxication include, but are not limited to: StumblingSlurring of wordsBloodshot eyesExtreme emotionsConfusionDrowsinessIncoherence If you have any inclination that an individual is drunk or high, you should not engage sexually with them. If they are unconscious or passed out, you should not, under any circumstances, perform any sexual act on them. Those most at risk of sexual assault are females ages 18 to 24 , but sexual assault can occur at any age, regardless of race, gender, and sexual orientation. When Sexual Assault Occurs “The days following an assault are difficult,” says Dr. Jeglic. “You will likely experience a variety of physical and emotional responses to the trauma. Everyone experiences [this] differently but it is not uncommon to feel fear, sadness, guilt, shame, anger, depression, anxiety and a loss of sense of self.” Dr. Jeglic recommends that you be with someone you trust or feel safe with and consider seeking professional help and social support, but also work on maintaining a routine and avoiding alcohol and drugs. “Know that you will experience a lot of different emotions,” she says. Recognizing Signs of PTSD After Sexual Assault A Word From Verywell The Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) provides a toll-free 24-hour hotline for victims of sexual assault at 1-800-656-HOPE as well as an online chat hotline. When you call the HOPE hotline, your call will be routed to a local RAINN affiliate organization (based on the first six digits of your phone number). When calling in on a cellular phone, there will be an option to enter your ZIP code (to more accurately route you to the nearest local sexual assault service provider). RAINN can help connect you to local counseling. If you’ve been sexually assaulted, know it is not your fault and recovery is possible. You can learn coping mechanisms, join networks of support, and work with experienced mental health professionals. How to Support a Victim of Sexual Assault 1 Source Verywell Mind uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy. Sinozich, S. Langton, L. Rape and Sexual Assault Victimization Among College Females, 1995-2013. U.S. Department of Justice Office of Justice Programs; 2014. By Sarah Sheppard Sarah Sheppard is a writer, editor, ghostwriter, writing instructor, and advocate for mental health, women's issues, and more. See Our Editorial Process Meet Our Review Board Share Feedback Was this page helpful? Thanks for your feedback! What is your feedback? 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